High-Risk Homosexual – Edgar Gomez

After a choppy start, Edgar Gomez’s engrossing memoir, “High-Risk Homosexual” morphed into an interesting dissection of cultural expectations, acceptance and self-discovery. For not knowing anything about the author — this was picked up solely because of the title — I was surprised at how emotionally invested I became in his life.

The title, a reference to sexual behavior, led me to believe this was a humorous take on growing up and coming out (similar to John Paul Brammer’s “¡Hola Papi!”) replete with awkward conversations and cringey encounters you’d share with friends over drinks. 

I was wrong but not disappointed.

From the first chapter, which featured Gomez at a cockfighting ring in Nicaragua with an uncle who later coaxes a woman home to “make him a man” to the Orlando native’s perspective on the aftermath of the Pulse nightclub shooting, there was little humor to be found in the pages but there was a lot of unfiltered commentary.

Gomez often references how growing up surrounded by machismo led him to take this approach to relationships leading to sex shame, toxic friendships and strained dealings with his family. 

But the author doesn’t fill the pages with “woe is me” anecdotes mining for sympathy. Rather, he presents a clear-eyed and relatable deconstruction of how messy early gay life can be — even more so when raised in a culture that values masculinity above all else.  

Even though we grew up in different parts of the country in vastly different circumstances, I could inherently relate to many parts of Gomez’s journey to becoming a successful, well-adjusted adult. 

Each chapter essentially followed a watershed moment in his life, and they range from a first boyfriend and making his first gay friends to moving out and struggling to exist without fear and internalized homophobia. 

Two standout sections occur around the halfway point, and it was these two vignettes that elevated “High-Risk” above other, similar chronicles. The first was a hilarious (really the only funny story) account of how he went “undercover” at a bathhouse to write a story for school. 

From wondering why the delivery driver may not stop by to restock the vending machines to trying to find connection with the people there for quick sex, it represents the vulnerable and misguided attempts young gays undertake to have a “real” gay experience.

The second — and possibly most divisive — essay discusses in detail the aftermath of the Pulse shooting. Even though he wasn’t there, he knew victims and mourned a place that had been a refuge. Introducing the murderer’s history into the narrative was a bold choice, but it was a powerful reminder of how support can alter the path life takes. 

While a niche memoir, it’s well worth seeking out. I didn’t love Gomez’s narration of the audiobook, but his words and story still shine through. 

Rating (story): 4/5 stars

Rating (narration): 2.5/5 stars

Format: Audiobook (library loan)

Dates read: September 20 – September 28, 2023

Multi-tasking: Good to go. Gomez structures each chapter around an idea that makes it easy to follow along with his story regardless of activity.