Boys Come First – Aaron Foley
Expectation: A story about three middle-aged friends heading on a vacation to reconnect and lick wounds from failed relationships.
Reality: There’s no vacation, but there is a lot of humor and heart in this lighter read about reconnecting, re-envisioning and reclaiming one's future.
My Take:
I’m often maligned for reading (mostly) depressing fiction and serious nonfiction, so in 2023 there’s a concerted effort to add a few more “fun” books into the mix. I’m not one for romance, cozy mysteries, young adult or crime procedurals, so there are a lot of genre caveats for the type of light — as in not too dense or thought provoking — reading I’ll choose.
“Boys Come First” was the perfect selection.
Described on the dustjacket as “a Sex and the City meets Waiting to Exhale about Millennial gay Black men,” it was the perfect mix of humor, romance and social commentary, which gave it an edge but never made things too serious.
Aaron Foley, a journalist making his literary debut, wrote an unabashedly gay story about three early 30s friends — Dominick (the Carrie), Remy (the Samantha) and Troy (the Charlotte) — who are trying to find where they belong in an evolving Detroit.
Dominick, a successful advertising executive, is moving back home from New York after losing his job at a startup and finding his partner of seven years in bed with another man. Troy, the social chameleon, is feeling trapped by a controlling boyfriend and faces career uncertainty. Remy, is a successful realtor known as “Mr. Detroit,” but he continues to pursue attached or unavailable men.
The characters and city were written with reverence. Sure, there’s some madcap fun, dating hijinks and convenient conflict, but Foley eschewed lazy tropes and instead grounded the story in a level of realism that’s highly relatable for gay men of a certain age.
A few things I loved:
The friendship - I’m glad that Foley kept this a story about platonic friendship and chosen family. So often writers create romance between main characters, which is predictable and lazy. It’s more difficult to write about people that love and respect one another but still let them down from time to time. While Dominick was the star, Foley gave each of the main characters a chance to shine through alternating POVs.
The setting - Foley explores the dynamics of “new” and “old” Detroit, and how gentrification — much of it stemming from the 2008 housing crash — has changed the literal face of the city. Our three characters, all Detroit born and raised, have spent careers navigating white spaces, but they see what code switching and embracing too much WASPiness is doing to the legacy of Black Detroit.
The conversations - There are some pearl-clutching comments that non-gay readers may be surprised to read, but they are 100 percent authentic and true to gay friendship. I was laughing out loud frequently and highlighting sections to text to others.
The relationships - Foley expertly breaks down the subcultures and pitfalls of dating within the gay community as you age. While this is first and foremost a celebration and exploration of being gay and Black, most gay men will be nodding their heads in agreement.
The novel started so strong that when it began to fall apart near the end I was crushed. It appears Foley didn’t really know how to wrap things up. The last 100-pages is a blur of subplots, tidy resolutions and throw away characters. It really began to feel like I was watching an episodic television series versus a contained story (unsurprisingly, the rights were recently optioned by Amazon Prime Video).
Criticisms aside, this is 100 percent worth the read if you’re looking for a palate cleanser, or are seeking perspectives of urban gay Black life outside of the coasts.
Rating (story): 4/5 stars
Rating (narration): N/A
Formats: eBook (library loan)
Dates read: January 27 – February 3, 2023
Multi-tasking: N/A
